"Daddy, I can't hear you. There's bread in my ear."

These are the gloves the nurse gave him the day he had the bread removed.

Boys are funny creatures. We've all heard ridiculous stories about kids sticking things in their nose, ears or mouth. Well, Austin takes the cake (literally and figuratively) for the most ridiculous ENT fiasco I think I've ever heard. 

Let me give a little background-

 My mom came up Tuesday so Joseph and I could have a little staycation in Louisville. I was able to get my haircut at the salon, and we had a great day shopping, eating out, going to the movies and hanging out at Starbucks before coming home to a house full of sleeping boys. It was kind of like going away for a night except we got to sleep in our own bed and didn't have to pay for a hotel.

Well, the vacation was over bright and early Wednesday morning when David woke up with a nasty cold and Austin began throwing up. Ugh! Could the day get any worse? 

It most certainly did.

About noontime, Austin started feeling well enough to eat some toast. That is where the craziness really begins. 

Joseph must have said something to Austin, and his response was, "Daddy, I can't hear you. I have bread in my ear." 

Are you serious???? I rushed over to look in his ear, and sure enough, there was a spitball sized wad of bread inside. Joseph and I left Austin at the table to look for tweezers (big mistake). Apparently, while we were scrounging around in the medicine box, Austin decided to jam the bread in further with his little finger. Argh! Needness to say, we couldn't get the bread out on our own. I called the pediatrician's office, and they got us a same day appointment with an ENT (ear, nose and throat doctor). What an ordeal!

But wait, it gets even crazier. The ENT couldn't get it out in the office and scheduled Austin for surgery the next day at the hospital. You've got to be kidding! Surgery to get some bread out of a kid's ear!!

We had to go through the whole pre-op routine at the hospital even though the "operation" would only take a few short minutes. Austin was very "uncooperative" (a word I saw written in his chart). He wouldn't let the nurse take his temperature, check his blood pressure, put on his arm band, etc. The only way we could get him to drink the sedative was to tell him that the alternative was a shot. Poor kid. It was all the same routine as last year when he had spinal surgery. It was hard to convince Austin that they weren't going to hurt him.

The surgery only took a few minutes. The doctor removed the bread with no problem, and he even cleaned out some wax from his other ear (a little freebie, I guess). There was no cutting involved, in case you are wondering. I could tell the nurses were amused at the little predicament our child had gotten himself into. He had caused a lot of problems with that little piece of bread. I don't think he will do it again, though. I hope he's learned his lesson. He's a boy, though, so we'll see.

Austin got a pair of gloves from one of the nurses as a sort of souvenir. I found him wearing them last night when I checked on him at bedtime. I thought it was the perfect picture to go with this crazy story. 

I still can't believe my kid has surgery to get bread out of his ear. He's never going to live this down.